9th: Mood in My Independent Reading Book (How I Would Do It)

My ninth grade writing assignment this week asks that you identify a mood in your independent reading books and analyze how the author created it. I will attempt the same assignment myself as a model, starting with a brief list of the steps I would take followed by a detail guide of my approach, including a finished response.

  1. Break down the prompt to ensure I meet all parts of it
  2. Select a section of my text and find many examples of especially evocative diction, imagery, or other details that give me an overall feeling of mood. 
  3. Reduce this list of examples down to a few that best express the mood I'm focusing on AND allow me to thoughtful explain their significance. 
  4. Draft

 

STEP ONE

The first step is to break down the prompt. I'm not going to copy it all out, but instead I will select just the details I need to be sure to address. I am also going to consider what these expectations mean to me. My breakdown follows:

  • "make a clear thesis that states the mood and elements (such as diction, imagery, juxtaposition, symbol, etc) used to accomplish this."
    • I will need to form a conclusion about mood and state it in a way that is easily understood. Because the prompt mentions the elements the author may have used (and gives examples), I know that I will need to use the same language in my response. I will need to talk specifically about diction, imagery, juxtaposition, and similar elements, making sure to actually use this kind of academic language.
  • "Include support [...] and explain how those details specifically contribute to mood." "Use multiple examples, with each example having 1-3 sentences explaining its effect."
    • I'm going to have to quote the text, and for each quote I use I will have to explain how mood is created or suggested.

STEP TWO

The text I'm currently reading is part of a short story collection, with the current story being "Memory Wall" by Anthony Doerr. I'll choose a section of this and begin hunting for words and phrases that give me an idea of mood. The section I will use is from the very beginning of the story, which I recall had a strong feeling of discomfort and confusion. These words and phrases are ones that I take special note of: "silent, predatory automobiles"; "Table Mounted [...] huge, green, corrugated"; "from door rattle open"; "arms jerk"; "floorboard [...] shrieks"; "shadow flows across the hall"; "Spilled water creeps"; "grandfather clock [...] pounds"; "Alma's pulse booms."

STEP THREE

The list I have is pretty good, but I need to reduce it so I can focus on just a few. The mood that best fits what I have here is foreboding and paranoid, so I want to choose the examples the demonstrate this mood most effectively. After careful consideration I select "silent, predatory automobiles"; "floorboard [...] shrieks"; and "Spilled water creeps." When I consider these examples, I have the most to say about them as images, examples of thoughtful diction, and symbols. If some of these images or words had contrasted, I might have chosen them because their juxtaposition created a particular mood, but that isn't the case here.

STEP FOUR

Now I need to draft, which I'll complete below, with comments on the right.

 

I make a point of identifying all the important information of my response in the first paragraph, including the text, author, elements used, and my statement of mood.

In Anthony Doerr's short story "Memory Wall," a foreboding, paranoid mood is created when the character of Alma is first introduced. This mood creates an atmosphere that reveals the mental state Alma lives in, and creates an early tension that pulls the reader in even before a conflict is established. The choice of language and imagery is instrumental to the creation of this mood.

I begin discussing evidence and what it means here. I try to quote the text accurately and use brackets where necessary to change tenses. My goal is to use the examples and my own reasoning to make a convincing argument about the use of language to create mood. I then wrap things up with a statement that returns to my original position.

Alma's home is described as standing apart from "silent, predatory automobiles" in the opening paragraph. This description suggests that to Alma, cars are a danger, like a jungle cat, and she their potential prey. This fear of common objects is intensified when floorboards are later described as having "shreik[ed]" and spilled water as "creep[ing]." Alma's paranoia of everyday items is felt by the reader by the author's careful creation of atmosphere through description. Ultimately, this fear creates expectation in the reader that there may be something lingering in the dark, causing floorboards to shriek and automobiles to drive silently and menacingly forward. The effective use of mood here by Doerr invests the reader in the narrative and the plight of the protagonist Alma, which could not have been done effectively without these choices of language and imagery.

 

You will notice that this response is notably shorter than the previous one. I encourage you to write as much as is necessary to address the needs of the prompt, and I believe that I have done so in these two paragraphs. If there is anything you feel I missed or would like clarification on, do not hesitate to leave a comment.